The Wall

It was a beautiful day to be at the beach. Sure, the water was only 54 degrees, but the niece and nephew were in it, playing for hours. Bob and I were sitting, soaking up the sun, watching the kids squeal and splash, when a family came by with their chairs and supplies. They began to set up a line of chairs in front of us. It was no big deal, really. We could still see the kids over their chairs - most of the time. I stood to see the kids at one point, and one man in the group said, "Oh, we're not in your way, are we?"

What do you say to that? Bob quickly replied, "Hey, whatever. Don't worry about it." He's my polite man.

I sat back down, and then ... it happened. We saw their chairs more clearly. Maybe I should say we saw ALL of each chair more clearly. They were the kind that have a hood of sorts on top. After a very quickly orchestrated maneuver by one of the women in the group, all five hoods were up, and then a towel was put over each one, to make the wall complete - and solid.

Our new view.

They knew what they were doing from the start. It was obvious they'd done this before. I started laughing. I took a video. I took this photo. I thought it must be a joke they have going - How many days this summer can we make a wall in front of people and get away with it?

Now what to do? How do we react in this situation? What do we say, if anything?

Bob got up, and said, "Let's move." He found a place not too far away, and started moving our (smaller) chairs and bags. I started fuming then. I do not like confrontations, but... but... nope. I do not like confrontations. So... I decided to - nonchalantly - stand in front of the person who did not go in the water. I stood about ten feet in front of him, hands on hips, watching my niece and nephew. For maybe one full minute. Well, at least until he got up to get something from one of their coolers they'd brought. It didn't make me feel any better.

I did it again, later, in front of one of the women. I counted seconds this time, because I wanted to stay there for at least three minutes. I didn't feel any better.

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I think of this wall and wonder how I'll respond to negativity at school, to things I know are not right, to words that are rude. Will I simply walk away and find another spot? Will I ask them a question back? Will I make a stink of some sort?

Afterwards, will I "could've / would've / should've" until I'm dizzy from my thoughts? Will I forgive myself for my new mistakes I'm sure to make? Will I be able to let go of guilt and move on with my day / week / month?

I worry about the start of the school year.
I worry about making the right decisions - reacting the right way.
I worry about not thinking things through before I respond.
I worry that my responses won't make me - or the person I'm responding to - feel any better.
I worry that I won't say the right things.
I worry that I'll ask leading questions (such as "We're not in your way, are we?").

I have these worries, and I need to push them to the back of my thoughts - not front and center. No matter the mental, emotional, or physical walls / obstacles / problems put up this school year, I am not going in blindly - I do have a plan.

My plan for this school year (and every school year):
     Breathe.
     Keep myself mentally and physically healthy.
     Be the best person I can be every day.
     Remember that each moment is a chance to start again.

Does every teacher go through these worries at the start of every school year? What do YOU do when these feelings strike? How do you mentally prepare for a new school year? As always, I'd love to read your thoughts in the comments below.